StC Killboard

"Meet thy maker, ill-fated shrew...
...go go Gadget Paw!!!"

SausageTheCat has turned evil since we moved to The Lodge.

He still sleeps for roughly 23-hours-a-day but in those 60 golden minutes of activity he has been eating, miaowing a lot and idly toying with the idea of going feral. And there's very little we can do to stop him - he's not very good at listening to reason and, besides, his English is rubbish.

So like a furry North Korean dictator he has started killing indiscriminately. He then kindly abandons his victims on our doorstep as gifts and sometimes they're so fresh that we have to employ the Brick of Doooom. It's all rather unpleasant. 

Strangely, we're still waiting for his first actual mouse kill (EDIT - August 14, 2015... he's caught one - or has he?). Truth be told we figured that mice would be his main source of entertainment, but how wrong we were. Although mice and voles look really quite similar when they're drowning in cat slobber, we're working on the fact that mice have long tails, whereas voles are shorties. As for the unidentifiable creatures... well, let's just say that they're in less than pristine condition at the time of their discovery.




Anyway, we have decided to monitor StC's progress for no other reason than it turns unavoidable death and stomach-churning gore in to a fun sport for the whole family to follow (see bottom of page).
Meanwhile I've knocked together an owl perch from some scrap bits of wood we've got lying on the 'to burn' pile, featuring a handy tray on which to present what's left of the poor unfortunate victims to the Tawny Owls we've got knocking about. So their deaths have not been in vain.


Two-and-a-half voles equals a good day's hunting

Autumn 2015 update: One unforseen problem with the approach of winter is that the leaves start falling from the trees. A thick carpet of brown leaves means that rodent carcasses are somewhat difficult to spot and are easily stepped on, hence the kill count below taking a nosedive from September onwards. The worsening of the weather (I'm typing this during a Met Office weather warning for thick fog that has actually come true) also means that StC is more reluctant to venture outside to continue his homicidal rampage.

Spring 2016 update: The kill drought continues, other than a single baby rat (which I know is called a 'kitten' but imagine a column in the table below called MOUSE / KITTEN) which Sausage kindly left tucked neatly behind the hose reel in the courtyard last month - his 50th confirmed kill. I dread to think how long it had been there. Other than that, he sleeps so much that I occasionally catch myself checking he's still breathing. True story.

Summer 2016 update: StC has taken some time off from his murderous rampage in order to avoid being eaten by GrumbleTheDog, who seems keen to add feline to his menu. June saw little movement on the Killboard as Sausage spent most of his time hiding in the shed, but July is picking up a little bit... although the unfortunate victims are beginning to appear on the floor of the shed itself rather than outside on the path.

Winter 2016/2017 update: Unfortunately the StC Killboard has had to be closed at 67 kills.
The addition of a dog to the fold has changed the entire family dynamic and Sausage has been understandably absent more than he has been present, meaning that if he is indeed squeezing the life out of further victims we don't get to see the results because he's not in a hurry to brag about his exploits and he doesn't want to give Grumble any ideas.
Meanwhile our efforts to make Mister G see StC as a pal rather than a starter are beginning to pay dividends thanks to carrots (read: pieces of hot dog) and sticks (read: a can of compressed air). They can now tolerate being in the same room together without any of the previous histrionics and they've even been left alone together without bloodshed.
In fact it's Sausage who does most of the growling now...


2016
VOLE
MOUSE /
BABY RAT
SHREW
HEADLESS
RED LUMP
MONTHLY
TOTAL
January
0
February
*
1
March * * * 3
April ** * * *** 7
May ** 2
June * 1
July *** * 4
August
September
October
November
December
Annual
Total
9
2
3 4
18
GRAND
TOTAL
35
3
10
19
67



2015
VOLE MOUSE SHREW UNIDENTIFIABLE MONTHLY TOTAL
April ****** 6
May ** **** ** 8
June (hols) ** * 3
July ****
**** 8
August ****** * ******* 14
September **** ** 6
October * ** 3
November



0
December * 1
RUNNING
TOTAL
26 1 7 15 49

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